What defines you? Lost another friend to depression. :(

What defines you?



A few years ago I had a computer stolen with years of short stories, quotes and inspirations that led me continue down the glass path. Which led into The Krakens. Was going to include these in a coffee table book titled “Kraken The Code”. Haha In a nutshell, i explained how many do not do what they love. Im fortunate to love doing many things except what others see as successful. I never planned to do glass, I actually planned eventually to go into Webdesign, to fund traveling. When I left Santa Cruz in 2013 to travel I said I will not spend 1 hour doing something I don’t love. I left on a quest! Not a journey! Journey is like taking a x country trip that’s planned. I’m talkin a quest to discover what I’m about and what feels authentic and natural. For me and for my friends who refuse to take charge of their position, some of which are no longer around. Now at 6 !

Depression I believe is one of the highest forms of mortality. Wtf?!?!! Why? Because they never found that love for something that defines them? I don’t know I’m not a psychologist but do see they did stuff sometimes only because their good at it. I’m good at hella things, things I’m even better at then glass. I refuse to do them because it would take time off the torch.

Friends in Silicon Valley would brag about making 500k, only to get depressed after loosing their job and the $. They were good at making $. Materialism will NOT make you happy, so wtf not do what you love and not worry about it’s compensation? Within reason I understand shits expensive, talking about fundamentally. Starting a path to what feels authentic when you do it. What makes 8hrs feel like a hour? I have rich friends who are even depressed. Some are depressed because they can’t pay their rent and I’m not talking about people who are born into bad circumstances. That said they even have a choice to change and hold themselves accountable to do what make themselves happy. Society isn’t happy on average so who gives a f^=## what they think. I suck a grammar so bare with me. :)

I’m just venting because I lost yet another friend do to depression (of course blaming on co vid but I know his backstory). He loved to grow weed. Not for the $ but just loved it. Now legal or not isn’t the issue he was a genuinely nice guy with only good vibes and intentions so why he couldn’t is not the topic. Years went by he couldn’t and eventually it got to him.

Like i said in prior post about there is more then one path to a goal (being happy) , one must realize there more potential opportunities if you stay moving forward. Like I said above I had no idea I would find a passion for glass that overrides now traveling and I don’t even update my page, let alone think of Webdesign. Haha

My friend never found a way because he let others aspirations of him take over and never gave himself his alone time to regroup. I just posted a Joseph Campbell post about needed that hour a day you don’t give a fuck what’s going on in the world and only focus on your own being. Luckily I get that time doing glass.


Taking a step further i now created a my room where I will not allow my cell, computer, tv, or hang pictures or allow distractions before I sleep to ask myself, do I still love what I do? If it changes I’ll pivot that next day. It’s possible if without static of society or distractions. Losing 6 friends to depression when it’s a gift to be born is fucking crazy I pledge to help my friends realize it’s ok to be and DEFINITELY beatable. Goodvibes only and stay positive out there friends who randomly come across this. Take a sec and check on to motivate friends who are in a battle. :)